Meme: Languages of Love
Sep. 2nd, 2004 02:40 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
emberleoFrom: http://www.greaterquest.com/LoveLanguages.asp
Quiz questions phrased like this don't quite work for me - I'm so used to reading around the phrasing to parse the essential logic of the question that I end up thinking "You already asked me this - changing how you phrased it doesn't change my answer. Stop trying to manipulate me into changing my answer!" which makes me answer more consistantly than usual.
But I realize some of this is a deliberate lineup of pairing each of the five things with eachother so that priority can be established. On the one hand I think the priority is actually correct in terms of how I interpret expression of intent, and acceptance of my own expression, and on the other hand I wonder how obvious that is to people who interact with me.
I mean, if you express a desire to spend time with me, I feel loved whether or not we actually find the time. And there are people I love tremendously that I nearly never get to see, but my love for them is measured far better by how much time I spend thinking about them than by how often I am able to be in their presence. There aren't enough hours in the day, days in the year, years in a life for me to spend enough time with everyone I love.
Touch is even more confusing, I imagine, given how jumpy I am about it. It's very true that if you know how to approach me (Which is, what, two people?), I feel very loved by being touched, hugged, etc. by those I love. In general, though, I expect it ends up more important to me that those I love respond positively to being touched by me, because I don't entirely have a choice about how sensitive I am to touch at any given moment, but when I want to be touched enough to reach out, it's usually fairly important to me. I've been working on being better about this for years now, but it's surprisingly difficult - between hypersensitivity, wariness of the sensitivities of others, and a veritable plethora of fears and concerns about everything from changing understood patterns to being rejected outright, I usually just stay self-contained well past the mark.
Time 11
Touch 7
Words 5
Gifts 4
Service 3
--Ember--
Quiz questions phrased like this don't quite work for me - I'm so used to reading around the phrasing to parse the essential logic of the question that I end up thinking "You already asked me this - changing how you phrased it doesn't change my answer. Stop trying to manipulate me into changing my answer!" which makes me answer more consistantly than usual.
But I realize some of this is a deliberate lineup of pairing each of the five things with eachother so that priority can be established. On the one hand I think the priority is actually correct in terms of how I interpret expression of intent, and acceptance of my own expression, and on the other hand I wonder how obvious that is to people who interact with me.
I mean, if you express a desire to spend time with me, I feel loved whether or not we actually find the time. And there are people I love tremendously that I nearly never get to see, but my love for them is measured far better by how much time I spend thinking about them than by how often I am able to be in their presence. There aren't enough hours in the day, days in the year, years in a life for me to spend enough time with everyone I love.
Touch is even more confusing, I imagine, given how jumpy I am about it. It's very true that if you know how to approach me (Which is, what, two people?), I feel very loved by being touched, hugged, etc. by those I love. In general, though, I expect it ends up more important to me that those I love respond positively to being touched by me, because I don't entirely have a choice about how sensitive I am to touch at any given moment, but when I want to be touched enough to reach out, it's usually fairly important to me. I've been working on being better about this for years now, but it's surprisingly difficult - between hypersensitivity, wariness of the sensitivities of others, and a veritable plethora of fears and concerns about everything from changing understood patterns to being rejected outright, I usually just stay self-contained well past the mark.
Time 11
Touch 7
Words 5
Gifts 4
Service 3
--Ember--
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 01:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 01:24 pm (UTC)That is sufficiently ME that I can't hardly blame you.
My actual RPG stats would probably cover more ground.
I was gratified to look at two old character sheets where my character's Charisma was based off of the group or GM's oppinion of my OWN Charisma and got a 15 from both groups!
o/` I feel Charming, Oh so Charming... it's alarming how charming I feel! o/`
--Ember--
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-04 03:29 pm (UTC)10 Words of Affirmation
6 Quality Time
2 Receiving of Gifts
3 Acts of Service
9 Physical Touch
Well, this would explain a lot about me. You think that MAYBE if I posted it on my LJ that he'd get a clue?
Hugs,
ME
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-05 01:31 am (UTC)Maybe he should take the quiz too, and you could compare notes?
--Ember--
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-05 02:12 am (UTC)I'll make the suggestion but I doubt anything shall be done..
Hugs,
ME
Interesting.
Date: 2006-09-26 11:37 am (UTC)10 Quality Time
5 Words of Affirmation
4 Acts of Service
0 Receiving of Gifts
Actually, that fits pretty well...
Sparrow
Re: Interesting.
Date: 2006-09-26 06:56 pm (UTC)Oh, in case it wasn't obvious to you - This is intended to measure only our appreciation of incoming gestures from other people. It doesn't necessarily automatically equate to how we tend to express our love towards others.
I suspect mine are slightly different, and I would guess that Acts of Service ranks a bit higher with you on the outgoing.
--Ember--
Re: Interesting.
Date: 2006-09-26 09:50 pm (UTC)Sparrow
Re: Interesting.
Date: 2006-09-26 10:01 pm (UTC)I'm so proud of you!
--Ember--
Re: Interesting.
Date: 2006-09-26 10:04 pm (UTC)Weird mood today,
*hugs*
Sparrow
Yeah ...
Date: 2006-09-26 02:09 pm (UTC)7 Words of Affirmation
9 Quality Time
3 Receiving of Gifts
4 Acts of Service
7 Physical Touch
love you!
Date: 2006-09-27 04:59 pm (UTC)Score Love Language
6 Words of Affirmation
7 Quality Time
1 Receiving of Gifts
6 Acts of Service
10 Physical Touch