RIP George Hersh

[emberleo]

George Hersh died this morning.

He was a revered elder and a dedicated therapist for our local Pagan community. I am way more upset by this death than I have been by others in my recent past. (There really *aren't* any deaths in my distant past - nobody died around me during my childhood.)

You'd think family members I was closer to than my former therapist would prompt more upset, but for whatever reason, not so much.

I have noticed that the deaths of people I wanted to know better but didn't get to tend to upset me more than the passing of people I knew as much as I felt I could or needed to.

Of course, it remains to be seen how well I'll take the deaths of family members I'm actually fairly close to, so maybe the point is immaterial.

I feel like I should be talking about George here, rather than myself, but you see half the problem is that I didn't GET to know him. He was my therapist, and was good about holding that boundary enough that I know almost nothing about him other than that he was a wonderful, wonderful man and I miss him terribly.

I had hoped he'd live long enough to attend my ordination, but I couldn't get off my ass to make it happen fast enough.

--Ember--

Comments

[brushwolf]

My condolences. I think "he was a damn good therapist" is a pretty decent memorial.

[jensurvivor]

Sorry to hear that. I do get the response of being upset for not having been able to get to know people before losing them.

[jensurvivor]

May I ask what makes someone a therapist for the pagan community? There have been some questions in my vicinity as to whether it's good to go to someone who understands paganism, or is pagan or whether that would lead to too much 'echo chamber' and it's good enough to have someone who tolerates paganism and is otherwise a good therapist.

If you want to talk about it of course.

[emberleo]

Well in this case George was both a licensed psychotherapist (PhD) and ordained Pagan clergy with an active practice and presence in the community.

I'm not sure how to answer your question as phrased - what makes a person a therapist for the Pagan community? Er, being a therapist, and serving the Pagan community?

No two Pagans are guaranteed to agree, so I don't think you'll end up with the echo-chamber effect any more than having two Christians is likely to cause that. Two people from the exact same *congregation* might, but even that isn't considered a problem when the religion in question is a Christian one, eh?

Having a Pagan-friendly counselor, not simply a Pagan-tolerant one, is very helpful when your issues involve the gods, but aren't caused by Them, and even more helpful when your problems ARE apparently caused by Them. There are plenty of psychological states that are not considered dysfunctional IF they are in a context and can be addressed via such, but could be *very* disordered if taken out of context. If your therapist doesn't really understand your context, that can cause as many problems as it supposedly solves.

That said, a really competent, Pagan-friendly but NOT themselves Pagan therapist should be just as good, and in some cases possibly more appropriate, depending on the situation.

These things are never yes/no questions.

-E-

[jensurvivor]

Wasn't looking for a yes or no? I just don't talk about spirituality or the gods with my therapist anymore. A part of that is that I don't talk about my spirituality with anyone, and another part is that she clearly thinks my spirit work is a manifestation of my dissociation. Can't say I blame her, but it means that I just don't go there.

[emberleo]

Yeah, that's problematic. A therapist who discards entire aspects of your experience in favor of a diagnosis isn't what I'd call Pagan Friendly (or, really, Mystic Friendly).

To be fair, it IS dissociation, in terms of *mechanism*. But that doesn't mean it's not also real and relevant, or that it's necessarily a bad thing.

-E-

forgive me for butting in... "but"...

[pearlshadow]

the best comment i ever heard about why george was an excellant therapist for teh pagan community was to paraphrase it.. "he could accept the statement, "yes, i DO hear the little voices however that is not where i am having a problem. "this" is what the problem/issue is... and one could progress forward from that point."

as both a practicing pagan and an elder in the community AND a licensed psychotherapit, he understood the speical situations that could arise out of ones religion and not get "hung up" that those "speical situations" were just that and not neccissairly a sign of an abnormal mind set...

Re: forgive me for butting in... "but"...

[jensurvivor]

Yeah, that would be nice. Thanks for elaboration.

[camillanightshade]

I am sorry to hear about your loss. I hope you are ok. big hugs