Love and Worship

[emberleo]

So, this will not seem terribly significant to many of you, I'm sure, but it's something I've wrestled with, so it counts as a kind of epiphany to finally put a finger on it this way:

Worship is not an expression of subservience. Worship is an expression of Love. More to the point, Worship is any expression of love.

It happens that Service is a major category for expressions of Love. It happens that Gifts are as well. These seem to be the two most commonly cited forms of Worship. But Verbal Affirmation, Physical Affection, and Time Spent are all expressions of love as well. And to me, a Desire to Know is the essence of Love itself - so anything that qualifies as expressing a desire to get to know me better registers as an expression of love.

Love Languages == Forms of Worship.

What's strange is that my human love languages don't seem to be the same as my divine love languages. With the Gods, my primary form of expression seems to be crafting gifts - my desire to know Them is expressed via an increased ability to make gifts that will please Them.

With humans my primary language seems to be Spending Time. Gifts are actually least significant to me by themselves. Or rather, Financial Expense is least significant to me. Gifts that show an understanding of who I am go over quite well, because they qualify as the result of a desire to get to know me.

But you don't really have to know me all that well to find shinies I will like - I'm a crafty pack-rat with overtly expressed tastes. I'm pretty sure I'm trivially easy to shop for, if all you're aiming for is my "Ooh! Shiny!" reaction. And I will never, ever complain about that, because I really do LIKE the Shinies. ;]

I suspect I have a tendancy to make people who do the giving feel loved simply by readily accepting their expressions of love towards me. Shinies make me demonstrably happy, but that's not quite the same as making me feel loved.

And I think I have finally put a finger on why I always feel just a tiny bit guilty when somebody gives me a shiny that I like - because I know they're trying to make me feel loved, and I know they aren't succeeding as directly in that as they probably think they are, because there's a layer of removal for me. So... it feels a little bit like lying, even though I'm not faking my happiness in the slightest.

--Ember--

Comments

[rentravler.livejournal.com]

I think I know where you are coming from in the gifts vs love thing. While I am, in fact, a shiny slut, and I do, in fact, love gifts, they also make me feel odd, especially if the person giving it is giving it as an expression of love. Love does not equal things, in my book. So, when I get flowers and gifts of the like (as my boyfriend loves to do), and cards from my various relatives (including my sister), I'm happy to receive them, but I don't want them to take the place of actual love. It's too easy, I think, to hide behind "things" instead of deal with the real emotions and feelings of a given situation. Cards (and the giving of cards) in particular are a pet peeve. what's a card but a hyped-up money maker for Hallmark? People loved each other deeply before Hallmark came around, fer Gods' sakes, yet giving cards is seen as equal to spending time, or meeting souls, or giving really meaningful gifts, or meeting a clear need.

Off of the soapbox now.